How to Help Your Child During a Crisis
Receiving a risk alert about your child's mental health or risky behaviors can be overwhelming and scary. These immediate reactions of fear and confusion are normal for a caregiver. Your response to this information is critical in shaping how your child experiences support and safety. Being prepared also ensures that you can get connected with the necessary support for your child’s well-being. The information here should provide you with steps to take if your child is in emotional distress: Understand Your Own Response Before talking to your child, take a moment for yourself. Breathe deeply. Give yourself permission to feel your own emotions without judgment. This is stressful! This isn't to get rid of what you're feeling, but rather to create space to respond with calm and compassion. Being more grounded in the moment, versus reacting from a place of emotion, can help your child feel understood. Create a Safe Space First, ensure immediate physical safety. If your child is actively exhibiting or threatening harmful behavior and is in immediate danger of harming themselves, stay with them and seek help right away. Call 911 or go to the nearest emergency room. You can also call or text the Suicide Lifeline (call 988) and Crisis Textline (text 741741), which are available 24/7. It’s essential to remove and safely store any dangerous or potentially harmful items in your home if your child is at risk of harming themselves, including firearms, knives, medications, sharp tools, scissors, and flammable devices. After ensuring physical safety, you can talk to your child in a calm and reassuring tone: Example (if they are calm): "I can see that you are in a lot of pain right now, and I am here for you. We will navigate this together, and I know resources we can use to help us." Example (if they are physically in distress (e.g., crying): " I know this is a lot. I can see these emotions are really strong in your body right now. Let's start by taking a few deep breaths together. I am here to support you." If they are not in immediate crisis, choose a quiet place to talk and reassure them that they are not in trouble. They may be more likely to share about challenges if they know you’re not angry with them. Begin the conversation in a quiet space: Ask them some general questions. It can be helpful to frame this as a statement if your child is likely to respond to a question with "yes" or "no". Example: "I noticed some things going on and wanted to check in with you. Even if it's hard to explain, I'm here. Can you tell me what's been happening? How are you feeling?" Example: "I noticed some things and wanted to check in with you. Even if it's hard to explain, I'm here. Tell me more about what's been going on." Asking what they want from you can help encourage more open communication Example: “Do you want me to just listen or help problem solve?” Listen & Reassure When your child opens up, it is important to listen. Often, we want to jump in and "fix" things. In this moment, validate their feelings and acknowledge that it sounds hard or that you can tell they are in distress. Reassure them that they are not alone and that you appreciate their openness with you. Sometimes, children have a hard time discussing these feelings. It's also okay if your child only shares a word or two. Reinforce and praise that. You can then use the 24/7 hotline above to help facilitate or navigate the situation if they are not telling you additional information. Other ways to provide support and empathy: Example: " I know this can be hard to talk about. I appreciate you sharing this with me, even though it may be stressful. I want to be there for you." Example: "This can be hard to talk about. I can just sit with you right now, and let me know whenever you are ready talk. I am here to listen." Additional Steps to Support and Help At Home Continue to foster open communication by building trust, so your child feels safe sharing their emotions. Create a safety plan: collaborate to recognize warning signs and outline steps for managing a crisis. You can use this 988 template (https://988lifeline.org/wp-content/uploads/2017/09/Brown_StanleySafetyPlanTemplate1.pdf). Build a support network: help your child identify people whom they trust and feel ok reaching out to during difficult times. Seeking Professional Help If you are concerned for your child’s immediate safety, contact emergency services: Call the Suicide Lifeline at 988 Text the Crisis Textline at 741741 Call 911 Bring your child to the nearest emergency room If your child is not in immediate danger Contacting a mental health professional or a community mental health center can help get your child connected with key services. Contact your child’s pediatrician for additional guidance and well-being advice. This article was developed in partnership with Zachary Bricken, Aura's medicals operations intern. Additional Resources More Information from Other Organizations about Steps, Resources, and Information Suicide Lifeline https://988lifeline.org/help-someone-else/ Crisis Textline: Help for Self-Harm https://www.crisistextline.org/topics/self-harm/ SAMHSA: Suicide Prevention https://www.samhsa.gov/mental-health/suicidal-behavior/prevention American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry Suicide Resource Center Child Mind Institute https://childmind.org/topics/suicide-self-harm/How safe is Roblox for kids? – An update to keep you in the know
TL;DR A majority of kids and teens today are using Roblox – an online gaming platform where users can play games, build games, and interact with other users Roblox doesn’t collect identifying information because it was created for kids, but predators can use this anonymity to their advantage The Roblox universe runs on Robux – a currency that can be purchased by adults to entice or bribe kids on the platform Roblox comes with risks, but there are updated safety features you can use, such as restricting direct chat with other users or setting Robux spending limits Read our previous blog about Roblox here What Is Roblox Anyway? Roblox has over 77 million daily active users, 32 million of whom are under age 13 (Bloomberg, 2024). The platform was initially created as a place for kids to be creative and learn how to build their own games online, and now there are millions of games in the universe. Because it was originally made for kids, Roblox collects very little information from users. Many older teens and adults use Roblox now too. Unfortunately, some users leverage anonymity to their advantage posing risks for kids on Roblox. The sheer size of Roblox, number of users, and potential risks may feel overwhelming for parents to navigate, which is why we’re here to help! The good news is, you don't need to be a tech wizard to make Roblox a safer space for your kid or teen. You already have the most important tools – your engagement and curiosity as a parent. This isn't about banning fun or hovering constantly; it's about understanding the environment and using the available tools (both on and off the platform) to guide your child confidently. Think of it as teaching them playground rules, but for the digital age. Decoding Robux: It's Not Monopoly Money If you’re a parent of a kid as young as age 6 and even into their later teen years, chances are you know what Robux are. Many kids and teens ask their parents for Robux for their allowance or as a reward for good behavior. If you’re not familiar, Robux are the virtual currency of the Roblox gaming world. Kids are excited by Robux, or rather what Robux can be used for– Robux can be used to customize avatars by buying clothes and accessories, for in-game experiences like skipping levels or access to VIP games, or even shopping at virtual stores like Walmart and Starbucks. But, Robux isn’t simply “fake money” because it can be purchased and exchanged for real-world money. Free Robux? A Red Flag! Like any other currency, Robux can be stolen or used to gamble and bribe other users. Bloomberg media put out an investigative piece on Roblox where they shared several examples of adults taking advantage of kids on Roblox. Robux were used to entice underage gamers as a grooming tactic in exchange for sexual acts in games, child porn, or inappropriate interactions in real life. Similarly, a report from More Perfect Union interviewing kids who engage in game development on Roblox, revealed instances of financial and child labor exploitation. Curious to know more? You can explore the Bloomberg documentary and the companion article. Updated Roblox Safety Features New Safety Features on Roblox and How You Can Make the Best Use of Them You can now take steps to deploy new safety features. In November 2024, Roblox introduced some new safeguards. Overall, age limits have been put into place for specific content. You, as a parent, can create a Roblox account linked to your child’s, employ monthly spending limits, and use additional safety features to help guide which experiences you are comfortable with your child accessing. How to make the most use of Roblox’s new safety tools Kids are going to use Roblox. Rather than placing harsh limits or banning Roblox altogether, we want to help you keep your child safe, healthy, and happy as they engage online. Here is a quick summary of the new Roblox safety features and how to access them. Limit Chat using Communication Controls: Chats increase the likelihood of your child interacting with strangers or more mature users. Limiting chat features can reduce the chance of risky interactions. You can: Disable experience chat: Select "No one" to set who your child can message with inside experiences. Restrict experience direct chat: Select “No one” to limit who your child can message 1:1 in experiences. Platform Chat, where users can chat with other users outside of experiences, is an exception and cannot be restricted for users over 13 More information on limiting chat features on Roblox can be found here under Communication Controls Keep Robux in check with Spending Controls: You can place monthly spending limits on your child’s account for Robux and other Roblox subscriptions. How to Set Spending Limits - from Roblox Create your own Roblox account and link it to your child’s: Creating your own account allows you to manage your child’s account without needing to login to their account. Linking instructions from Roblox Limits under age 13: Users under 13 now have some limits on Roblox Children under 13 years old can no longer directly message (“Platform Chat”) other users on Roblox outside of games or experiences. This change mitigates some risk of those under 13 interacting with strangers, older teens, or adults who may share inappropriate content on the Roblox platform. Those under age 13 also can’t send direct messages to other users within games, but can send “public broadcasts” within the game. Some experiences are age-gated based on content maturity. Content Maturity Labels: These can help guide your understanding of what content your child may encounter in experiences and games. You can also set maturity controls for your child. Kids under age 9 can only access “Minimal” or “Mild” forms of content Check out the descriptions from Roblox below (https://en.help.roblox.com/hc/en-us/articles/8862768451604-Content-Maturity-Labels) How to set maturity controls - from Roblox Content Maturity Label Description Minimal May contain occasional mild violence, light unrealistic blood, and/or occasional mild fear. Mild May contain repeated mild violence, heavy unrealistic blood, mild crude humor, and/or repeated mild fear. Moderate May contain moderate violence, light realistic blood, moderate crude humor, unplayable gambling content, and/or moderate fear. Restricted May contain strong violence, heavy realistic blood, moderate crude humor, romantic themes, unplayable gambling content, the presence of alcohol, strong language, and/or moderate fear. These experiences are only available to 17+ users who verified their ages by completing ID verification. Use Roblox as an opportunity to connect with your child or teen Be Curious, Not Accusatory: Ask open-ended questions about their Roblox time. "What games did you play today?" "What was the coolest thing you built?" "Did you play with any friends?" "Did anything weird or uncomfortable happen?" Talk About "Stranger Danger" Online: Explain that online "friends" are still strangers. Emphasize never sharing personal information like their real name, school, address, phone number, or passwords. Discuss In-Game Purchases: Help them understand that Robux cost real money. If they use Robux, talk about budgeting and responsible spending. Create a Team Mentality: Frame safety discussions as working together. "Let's figure out how to make Roblox fun and safe for you." Teach Digital Citizenship Skills Although Roblox has made some safety updates, there are still risks with using Roblox, such as cyberbullying and inappropriate content with violent or sexual themes. You can equip your child with the knowledge to handle tricky situations themselves. Blocking and Reporting: Show them how to block users who make them feel uncomfortable and how to report inappropriate behavior or games directly within Roblox. Let them know it's okay – and important – to use these tools. Recognizing Scams: Talk about common scams (like fake "free Robux" offers) and why they shouldn't click suspicious links or give away account information. Taking Breaks: Encourage healthy screen time habits. Set limits for Roblox play, just like you would for screentime generally, TV, or other activities. We want you to feel empowered in your digital parenthood to raise a well-informed digital citizen so that your child is better able to engage in online gaming and interactions more safely with eyes open. This article was created in partnership with Bayley Taple. References https://www.bloomberg.com/features/2024-roblox-pedophile-problem/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n6PYj93SGxc https://en.help.roblox.com/hc/en-us/categories/200213830-Parents-Safety-and-ModerationNew Resource: Tech/Life Balance Movement & Outdoor Guide🏕️
We’ve all seen it. Too much screen time leaves kids overstimulated, irritable, and disconnected from the world around them. Research confirms what families feel—kids need more movement, nature, and real-world connection. That’s why the California Partners Project and California First Partner Jennifer Siebel Newsom created a new guide to help families find better tech/life balance—without stress, shame, or unrealistic expectations. Inside, you’ll find: ✔ Conversation starters to help you connect ✔ Actionable tips to promote movement and time in nature ✔ Creative ways to work with tech—not against it This is about progress over perfection. And the guide is designed for real families doing their best in a tech-saturated world. ✨ Get the guide hereNew Resource: Tech/Life Balance Family Report & Guide📚
Our latest "Tech/Life Balance" resources are now available to the DigitalParenthood community! The first installment in our series is focused on social-emotional health and gives parents the tools to foster stronger communication and resilience in their kids. We believe that meaningful connection is the best defense against today’s digital challenges. These resources are grounded in real stories from California families and leading experts and offer practical strategies that families can implement right away. To celebrate, Jennifer Heifferon (Program Director of Child Well-being) sat down with DigitalParenthoods Dr. Scott Kollins and talked about all of the ways that the resources can help parents. Download the resources below! ⬇️
The Teen Advisory Panel: Shaping Aura's Balance Tools for Teens, by Teens
At Aura, we believe the best way to create tools for managing digital well-being is to listen to those most affected by technology—teens. That’s why we created our Teen Advisory Panel: to ensure our balance tools are not only science-backed but also aligned with the needs and concerns of the teens who will use them. Designed to help families foster healthier digital habits, these tools focus on areas like screen time, nighttime activity, and social interactions. By consulting a diverse group of teens across the U.S., we created features that empower both parents and teens to manage digital behaviors in a supportive, privacy-respecting way. These tools are shaped by real teen input, not just expert research, to ensure they are relevant and practical—helping families find the right balance between tech use and well-being. Q: Why did you decide to create a Teen Advisory Panel? Kids are the best experts when it comes to understanding their own experiences, especially with technology. It's easy for adults to assume we know what's best, but we can't truly understand their digital world unless we listen to them directly. The Teen Advisory Panel is more than feedback—it’s a partnership. We wanted teens to help shape a product that balances privacy, independence, and well-being, ensuring the tools we’re developing are something they actually want and need. Q: How did you engage with the teens, and how did you collect their feedback? We recruited teens from across the U.S., ensuring a mix of geographic, ethnic, and cultural diversity. By hearing from a diverse group of teens, we aimed to create tools that not only provide insights for parents but also empower teens to take control of their tech habits. The panel engaged through live sessions and surveys, offering real-time feedback on features like screen time tracking, nighttime activity monitoring, and social pattern analysis. We also used these sessions to identify barriers, like privacy concerns, and learn how we can address them in the product. Q: What did you learn from their feedback, especially around potential barriers? Transparency was key. Many teens were concerned about how much information their parents would see. They wanted privacy but also recognized the importance of parents having insights to help guide healthier habits. After seeing prototypes, however, the teens felt more comfortable, as they understood how the tools would be used to support their well-being rather than invade their privacy. Q: Will there be a focus on improving the online balance experience? Yes! The goal of these tools is to help families create a balanced digital lifestyle. Teens told us balance isn’t just about limiting screen time; it’s about understanding their routines and helping parents see shifts in behavior, such as how late-night gaming affects sleep. Our tools will provide real-time feedback, customized to each family’s needs. It’s not about policing but about fostering healthier tech habits in a way that works for everyone. Q: How will the Teen Advisory Panel continue to influence product development in the future? The Teen Advisory Panel isn’t just a one-time feedback session—it’s an ongoing partnership. We’ll continue to engage with teens to ensure that our tools evolve alongside their changing needs. Their insights will keep guiding updates and new features, ensuring that Aura’s digital balance tools remain relevant and effective in helping families navigate the complexities of digital life. Q: How can parents and teens learn more about Aura's digital balance tools? If you're a parent wanting to understand your child’s digital habits—or a teen seeking ways to manage screen time, sleep, and social interactions—Aura’s balance tools are designed for you. We’ve worked closely with teens like those in our Teen Advisory Panel to create features that are insightful and respect privacy. To learn more, click here. Together, we can create a balanced digital lifestyle that supports both parents and teens in navigating the challenges of today’s connected world.Raising a Connected Generation: Dr. Becky on Parenting in the Digital Age 🎥
A throwback to our DigitalParenthood Summit back in June! NYT Best-Selling Author and Clinical Psychologist Dr. Becky Kennedy sat down with award-winning, Emmy-nominated journalist Poppy Harlow at our NYC Digital Parenthood Summit to offer parental guidance in the digital era, emphasizing that keeping kids safe is more important than keeping kids happy. The same way they can't have dessert until they finish their broccoli, children's use of technology must also be moderated. Here are 5 key ways parents can set strong boundaries: First, understand the difference between your child’s wants and needs. What purpose will technology serve them? Does your child need the new social media app they’re asking for, or do they simply just want it? Rather than brushing off requests, have conversations with your kids about the purpose they believe this new app will serve in their life. There may be a valid reason for downloading it. Second, form a group of parents to have continuous conversations over the years. Parents will avoid making split-second decisions and feel sturdier when their children go to them. Your kid will tell you that they are the only kid to not have a certain device, bedtime, or app. Years before this, when your kids are too young to negotiate, Dr. Becky recommends getting a group of parents together to discuss and plan how you all will approach these boundaries. Third, encourage kids to “gaze-in” on themselves, rather than seeking validation on social media. The way we parent our kids sets them up for how they approach the world. Naturally, people tend to focus on what everyone else is doing before considering our own values, interests, and feelings. By providing infinite access and constant exposure to other peoples’ lives, social media only adds to this pressure. It’s important that children build their confidence inside-out, rather than waiting to be told if they’re good enough. Fourth, keep the parent-child relationship separate from the technology-child relationship. Even as adults, it is difficult for us to put our phones down because it’s designed to make us unable to do that, so how can we hold our kids to such high expectations? The difference is that kids don’t make decisions for themselves, we do. So instead of setting ourselves up for frustration and children up for a power struggle or punishment, we must set a boundary that allows us to embody parental authority and tolerate our kids being upset. And lastly, give yourself permission to change course. If you were on a plane, you would want your pilot to give themselves permission to make an emergency landing if any flight information changed. Many parents disempower themselves by assuming what’s done is done. But good leaders, upon getting new information, change their plans to realign with the outcomes that they care about. Watch Dr. Becky’s full panel here:
Helping Your Teen Cope with Online FOMO
Do you remember the feeling of going to school and hearing about how much fun your friends had at a social gathering that you weren’t invited to? It really stung, right?! Now, imagine how much more upsetting it would have been if you had access to endless amounts of photos online showing everyone having fun without you. Thanks to social media, smartphones, and a 24/7, always-on digital world, today’s teens are at risk of being consistently exposed to the heavily filtered highlight reels of their peers' lives. So, while social media can be a great place for teens to connect and express themselves, it can also create views about other people’s lives that aren’t based in reality. To break through the feelings of missing out or painful comparisons, it can be helpful to talk to your teen and give them tools so that they can better cope with their online experiences. What is FOMO? FOMO is an acronym that stands for “fear of missing out,” and it’s an incredibly common and normal experience. FOMO usually happens when someone realizes they weren’t invited to a social event. People who experience FOMO often feel as though they aren’t wanted, are less socially desirable, or are inferior to their peers. It can cause an increase in negative thinking, impact self-confidence, and increase social anxiety or feelings of isolation. Social media is one of the leading contributors to FOMO and can begin to take a toll on a teen’s mental health. Ways to help your teen through FOMO Experiencing FOMO can be lonely and confusing. It’s important to open up the conversation with your teen so that they know you are there to support them anytime difficult feelings come up. Here are some tips for talking about FOMO: Actively listen. You’ve likely felt left out before, so take a moment to connect with that feeling so that you can approach your teen’s situation with empathy and understanding. Try to put away distractions, like phones, so that you can be fully present for the conversation. Repeat back what your teen has said so that they know they’re being heard, and consider sharing a time when you’ve had a similar experience. Take them seriously. We can often dismiss teens as being “dramatic,” but remember that social dynamics are so important to teens. Try to hear what is going on from their perspective without attempting to fix it. Help to reframe unhelpful thoughts. We all have a voice inside that can say not-so-helpful things sometimes. Encourage your teen to notice how they’re speaking to themselves while scrolling on social media. If that voice says something like, “You’d never be invited to a party like that” or “I don’t have any friends,” ask them to consider how they could replace the unhelpful thoughts with more positive, realistic ones. One example would be, “I may not have been invited to this party, but I have lots of friends who like spending time with me. Maybe I’m feeling lonely, and I should call one of them to hang out.” Teach content curation. Talk to your teen about the ways in which the content they consume can affect the way they feel. Encourage them to unfollow or mute social media accounts that make them feel bad about themselves and to continue to be hyper-aware of the impact of the information and images they take in. Could they follow more accounts that focus on something they love, like art, nature, or cooking? Encourage offline hobbies and extracurricular activities. Help your child seek out environments and social settings where they feel safe and accepted. Could they join a community theater, play sports with friends in the park, or take a music class? Schedule tech breaks. Are there a few windows of time throughout the week that you can ask everyone in the family to unplug? Maybe you designate meal time as a screen-free zone or take a nature walk on a weekend morning? Can you all agree to keep phones out of your bedroom at night and set up a charging station in the kitchen? It’s not going to look perfect, so give yourselves some grace and do your best! Discuss support systems. Reassure your teen that there are tons of people out there who have experienced FOMO and talk about who they can turn to when they’re feeling down. Who are the trusted adults in their lives that they can turn to and what friends can they reach out to for support? Have regular check-ins. FOMO is something that your teen will likely experience time and time again. Be sure to keep the conversation going, letting them know that you understand and you’re always there to listen. It’s not always the right time to talk, so if they’re not feeling it, tell them they can always come to you at another time. By opening up the conversation at home and providing realistic tools and ongoing support, you’re showing your teen that they are not alone and that their well-being matters to you. If your teen is struggling to cope with FOMO or other difficult emotions, consider reaching out to a mental health professional for additional support.
Prioritizing your family’s mental health in the new year
As you look ahead, ask yourself what are some things that you and your family can do to feel your best for 2025? The new year is a perfect time to prioritize mental health. From building healthier habits to creating a circle of support, there are small steps you can take now that will add up to big changes throughout the year. To help you get started, we’ve put together realistic ways to help prioritize your family’s mental health. How to make mental health a priority Set realistic expectations. Try not to put pressure on yourself to do it all perfectly. It’s simply not realistic to expect yourself to go to the gym every day, be the most patient parent 100% of the time, or to have a spotless home 24/7. Don’t try to change everything overnight. Start with small, achievable goals and celebrate your small wins. Find moments of movement. Can you tap into ways to make exercise a little more fun for the whole family? What types of movement do you most enjoy? Can you create a playlist and have a dance party at home? Want to gather friends or family and head to the ice skating rink or the bowling alley? Can you bundle up and take a nature hike or prepare your garden for the season ahead? If you make movement more enjoyable, you’re likely to stick with it and feel better both physically and mentally. Get outside when you can. The colder temperatures can make getting outside much more difficult but, if you can, try to get some fresh air first thing in the morning. This one habit can make a big difference in how you feel and can be especially beneficial for those who are impacted by the changing seasons. Prioritize sleep. Getting enough sleep is essential to our physical and mental health. It allows our bodies and minds to recharge, supports our immune system, helps with emotional regulation, and boosts cognitive functionality. To get your best night’s rest, try keeping a regular schedule, put away screens at least two hours before bed, make your room a dark, cool space, and try calming activities before sleep, like taking a bath, journaling, or meditating. Take tech breaks. We know that this one isn’t easy, but try setting realistic limits on how much time you spend on your phone, in front of your computer, or streaming TV shows. Our devices are designed to keep us hooked, so consider setting app time limits (especially for those never-ending social media scroll sessions) to help you out. Using technology isn’t a bad thing, but try to prioritize offline activities and connections with those around you. Create a calming space. Is there a spot in your home where you can go to relax? Whether it’s a cozy reading chair, your bed, or a kitchen nook, identify a space where you can unwind. Try to clear out any clutter and add special touches. These can include essential oils for a little aromatherapy, relaxing music, a plant, plush pillows, art that makes you happy, books you enjoy, or photos of those you love. You can use this space to have mindful moments with breathing exercises, journaling, or whatever feels good for you. Learn to say no. From taking on extra work projects to volunteering at your child’s school, it can be tempting to try and do it all. But if your to-do list is never-ending, try delegating tasks to other family members or co-workers and declining requests to take on more. It can be difficult to say no sometimes, but it’s important to take care of yourself and prioritize accomplishing what matters most to you. Ask for support. If you or someone in your family could use more support, consider reaching out to a therapist or a coach. A mental health professional can help you to better understand and process complex emotions, while giving you tools to help you feel your best. The mental health of you and those around you matters so much. The new year offers an opportunity for a fresh start in which you prioritize your well-being. Remember to ask for support from those around you and offer yourself some grace for it all to look perfectly imperfect.
